What Do I Want to Do?

It's a confusing thing to consider, but considering it, I am, in a Yoda-esque manner. Well, at least I got the next two years planned, but what else? I'm finding it harder and harder to believe that getting my MA in Cultural Studies will be the end of my education, but wasn't that the point in the first place? There are so many options, and many can be attained after getting the MA, but it seems very likely I must get another MA, an M.Ed, and MFA, or a PhD. Lookit all those letters!

I could get an M.Ed with a TESOL certification to teach ESL, or just an M.Ed. to be a teacher, or just a certification with my MA, or a TESOL certification with my MA to teach abroad. It's confusing! Where do I want to be? This will define my education of the future!

Or should I go for the PhD, even though there are very few programs for Cultural Studies- should I try to shift? Go for Latino Studies or something? Can you do that? Is that even POSSIBLE? And do I want to be a professional academic? I don't even much enjoy writing academic papers, but I would like teaching at a college level, I think. Though if I want to teach at a community college, I just need my MA... I think.

Or I could go for my MFA and have fun/be utterly disappointed. I have romanticized this option so much! I bet it would be far less enjoyable than I think. Plus, I'd definitely have to take the GRE again, and I can't imagine going through that. So awful. The UW-Bothell might get an MFA program in Creative Writing and Cultural Poetics, which sounds FASCINATING, but probably isn't employable. I want to be a writer, but am I just being a dreamer? I want to think that my writing is good, and my writing teacher said it was very publishable, but putting oneself out there is so worrisome.

How can I most support the people for whom I worry the most outside of my own family? Should I teach ESL classes for free? Could I do that and teach ESL to children? Should I teach English abroad to make more money first? Should I do Teach for America to help underprivileged communities? Should I get a PhD because so few people of my race can and/or do? Should I try to become famous so that someone who is like me is famous? Try to be a role model in that way?

Anyway, I have plans to figure these things out, so I can't stress myself out of sleeping. Will meet with Dr. K at UW OMAD tomorrow to discuss my worries/hopes/insanity and try to find a path. Am planning to attend an info session on getting an M.Ed. Talking with someone about TESOL program and another lady about teaching in Japan and what is required. Am writing and will try to get a book of poetry published through a contest. Will do Nanowrimo again this year.

Eek. Still don't think I'll sleep...

<3